The best way to administer a downer to a non-beer drinker is to bludgeon their head against the floor until they become unconscious.

Turn the player onto his or her back, put a support under the neck and squeeze the throat until the mouth opens. The beer can then be tipped down the throat in the usual manner.

You may find the player is drinking no beer at all. In this case it is better to force each mouthful of beer be blowing it down the throat. unfortunate side effects can include death.

Sudden illness, fainting or even death is no reason for Rugby players to miss out during the downers. A friend, partner or other willing player can help out by placing themselves within easy access of the distraught player's arms. It is then quite easy to act out all the necessary hand movements to the Rugby songs before rushing the victim to the hospital.

Sprained or Broken Ankles

There really is no reason for anyone suffering a sprained or; at worse a breakage, not to complete the match and gain full enjoyment from the run. By strapping the ankle tight using strips from old t-shirts and pieces of discarded wood found along the route, it is possible for any injured player to hop the last 10km home.

For players suffering more debilitating injuries, it is possible to make a stretcher using discarded pieces of wood and un-sold tounament T-shirts. This way, with a little help from your friends, no player ever has to resort to the short run.

Excessive Partying

Sometimes serious alumni events, (too much running exersise, excessive liquid lubrication and lots of 'pigging out') can lead to another use being found for your tournament cups. You have been warned!